Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
