i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
