Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
