Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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