I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
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