lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
