Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I'm having to shit out rocks
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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