He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
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having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
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It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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