thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize