ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize