The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Randomize