if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
