...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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