Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
