true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
