So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
