I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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