we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize