dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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