Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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