i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
