i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
