Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
you didnt know i had herpes?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Randomize
