Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
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I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
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I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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