So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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