Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
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I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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