My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize