it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
