Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize