I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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