So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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