i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize