help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
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