Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Michael Bay diarrhea
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
