Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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