I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
