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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I'm just crazy horny about you
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
