I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize