I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
