I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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