Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
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he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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