so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
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In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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