Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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