Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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