Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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