JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
