Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.