I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
ugly people sure do ruin things
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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