considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
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