Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Randomize
